Summary: Mueller makes 8-min statement basically saying “WE DID NOT EXONERATE”

Best-possible birthday gift or lump of coal?

Special Counsel Robert Mueller—who for nearly 2 years investigated the Trump-Russia scandal, thus my filing to Cyber/NatSec—will give public statements on his investigation today at 11 a.m. He will not be taking questions.

Today is yours truly’s birthday so Bob *better* not disappoint. Can I call ya Bob?

I’ll be doing a live blog and quoting Mueller as it happens. Please check back at 11 and follow along! //

11:00 am—just received a robo call from the RNC; noted

11:00—we’re underway

11:02: platitudes

11:02: “attack on our political system” is new rhetoric at least to me

11:03: not “interference” it’s sabotage why won’t people fucking say it

11:05: so far this is Cliff Notes of his report

11:06: “we did not make a determination as to whether the president* did commit a crime”—WHY TF NOT?

11:07: if charging and prosecuting a sitting president* is “unconstitutional” then congrats we have an Emperor not a president*

11:09: title of this presser is “WE DID NOT EXONERATE”

11:10: there we have it. “I certainly don’t question the AG*’s good faith in the decision” to release the report on his own terms. Mueller’s a technocrat foot-solider and follows orders.

11:14: we found the actual “nothing-burger”—it’s that Mueller cowed before MAGA cult and did his part to further the myth of “no collusion.”

only remedy here is impeachment so Nancy Pelosi, if you’re listening, you’ll be greatly rewarded by America if you go do that. MAKE the Senate endorse Donald’s transnational criminal mafia and it will help power us to victory in 2020.

we WILL get the answers to these questions. next year, in 5 years or 10—but the truth will see the sunlight and it will be devastating for all traitors involved. we should be marching in the fucking streets RIGHT NOW. //

graphic below: Mueller Probe By The Numbers via ABC News below


Will Pollocksideways is a perpetually crabby New York City escapee based in Midtown Atlanta. He’s a freelance multimedia journalist, media analyst and author of two books (award-wining Pizza for Good & Leaving Triscuit), with more on the way.

In 2001, Will earned his Masters from The Medill School of Journalism, graduating with highest honors from the magazine sequence. As permanent member of Journalism’s National Honors Society, he’s been active in monitoring, writing and blogging about media and journalism ever since he graduated.

Obsessed with good storytelling and journalistic excellence, Will uses snark, humor and reason to distill dumb shit and make it fun. He’s a seeker/maker of non-consensus news, and helps you cure crankies by finding the nut in every story.

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